BLOOMINGTON, IND. — The Bleeding Heartland Rollergirls Flatliners of Bloomington, IN, defeated the COMO Derby Dames of Columbia, MO, 102-71, on Saturday, August 23, in a much-anticipated rematch entitled TERRIBLE TWOS in celebration of the second anniversary of both leagues.

Last year the Derby Dames came to Indiana and rolled away with a heart-stopping last-minute 87-85 victory. Eager for revenge, and despite the long-distance derby love between these teams, the 2-0 Flatliners were out for blood, while the Dames were determined to end their season by besting BHRG on the road.

Injuries and depth of bench were deciding factors going into Saturday’s contest. BHRG was down several veteran blockers, including Spynn, Margles McNasty, Charmed & Dangerous, Old Broad, Molly McFracture, and X Libris, while COMO had to make do without big players Whiskey ShinDig, Bitchie Valens, Kimical Burn, Dethblok, and Scorpia. The home team was still able to field a nearly full roster, however, while the traveling COMO team skated with a roster of just ten.

With that advantage, the Flatliners never trailed COMO. They jumped out to an early lead, and strengthened it with back-to-back 8- and 10-point jams by Killer Kindness and Kaká Caliente, respectively. Toward the end of the first half, the Derby Dames were able to slow down their opponents with the solid blocking and heavy checks of Bucks 'Em Butterfly, Roxy Horror, and Hearse Die-Mond, allowing COMO jammers Slamrock, Adderoller, and Momma Knee-ya to cut the Flatliner lead to 14 at 42-28.  But in jam 15, Flatliner Kaká Caliente put 9 more points on the board, to Slamrock's 4, leaving the score at 51-32 at halftime.

The beginning of the second half was no kinder to the Columbia skaters.  The first jam ended with Flatliner Kaká Caliente outscoring COMO 9-0. After a 3-point shutout jam by Slamrock, Flatliner Unicoroner completed 2 grand slam passes in the third jam for 10 points, bringing the score to 70-35. By mid-period, the Flatliners secured their lead with another 10-point shutout from Kaká, followed by 9 unanswered points from Badd Mudda Trucka in her first appearance of the night as jammer, having spent most of the bout in the pivot position, a departure from the norm for her.

With the score at 98-47, and with the game clock on their side, the Flatliners were able to play a more conservative game for the rest of the period, and the COMO Dames took advantage of this to narrow the gap. Still competing at a high level, even though the outcome was decided, Slamrock put up 15 more points for COMO in the last few minutes, along with 5 each for Ninja Skwidd and Momma Knee-Ya. COMO shut out the Flatliners in the last 3 jams of the game, but to no avail. Final Score: 102-71.

High scorers for COMO were Slamrock, who racked up 48 points, and Momma Knee-Ya and Adderoller, each with 9 points.

High scorers for the Flatliners were Kaka Caliente, 51 points (league all-time high); Unicoroner, 20 points; and Felanie Charges, 10.

Plans are already in the works for a third COMO vs. BHRG bout in 2009, but this bout marked the end of COMO’s 2008 travel season. They'll next be defending their home turf  against the River Valley Roller Girls from Fort Smith, Arkansas.  The next BHRG bout is another rematch, as the 3-0 Flatliners travel to Covington, KY, to face the 3-3 Black-n-Bluegrass Moonshiners on September 20.

Additional reporting: Dick Smack, Bat Wing
Photo: Ron Nehrig