derby news network

Well along into a pretty substantial site structure and engine overhaul, we have struck a serious obstacle: we here at DNN suck at colors. We’ve got an awesome new logo courtesy of Nashville Rollergirls’ Slugs Bunny, and we’re just a couple color choices away from getting the new tools skinned up and ready to rock, but we’re facing the facts: we need your help.

Artists of the derby world, if you love DNN and want to help us make it even better, now is your time. Please, take this:

And make it all colorful and awesome. Post a link to your submission in the comments below, or email it to us. If you can solve our color helplessness, we can get back to the more important business of keeping you up to date with the modern derby revolution!

On Saturday, the 16th ranked Boston Massacre will host 26th ranked Cincinnati Rollergirls at the Shriner’s Auditorium in Wilmington, MA. Cincinnati will be looking for their 4th win this season, but Boston will be looking to extend their 2-0 winning streak.

Cincinnati has started off the season strong, with wins over Fort Wayne, Naptown, and Ohio and a recent win over Derby City in an exhibition game. Notably, the Naptown game set a new record for the lowest total score ever in a WFTDA-regulation bout — Cincinnati won 59-32. Cincinnati’s roster features several versatile players including Hannah Barbaric and Roseanne Scarr who are noted for being excellent blockers as well as fast jammers. CRG will undoubtedly impress the Boston crowd with their speed, agility, and maneuverability.

This will be the Boston Massacre’s third all-star game of the season, with previous wins a 119-69 over then-unranked ranked Dominion (now on the board at in the #20 spot) and a 116-49 exhibition bout win over the Bronx Gridlock, the Gotham Girls’ reigning local champions. With several pack weapons, the Boston Massacre is firing in good rhythm and their blocking teamwork and pack communication are on par to make this a strong match-up.

The Cincinnati Rollergirls will be fielding a full roster of 14 as will the Boston Massacre. Missing from the Massacre line-up will be Anna Wrecks’ya and Miss Mary Smack, who will be replaced by Harlot Fevah and Sugar Hits. This is sure to be an exciting game with both strong offensive and defensive play. Boston’s “JV” squad, the Boston B-Party, opens the action with a face off against the currently unranked all-star team from the Connecticut Rollergirls (correction: not the all-star team, a combination of all-stars and local CT players.)

For Cincinnati fans not able to travel to Beantown, the bout will be shown via a live feed on the big screen TV at the Underground at the Know Theater at 1120 Jackson St. in Over-the-Rhine.

The Cincinnati Rollergirls will next skate at the Cincinnati Gardens on Saturday, May 17 at 7:00 p.m. against the 9th ranked Philly Roller Girls. The bout is a double-header, with the Black Sheep dueling Philly’s Liberty Belles and the Cincinnati Rollergirls “B” team, the Silent Lambs, skating against the Black-n-Bluegrass Girls from Northern Kentucky.

The Boston Derby Dames’ next bout wraps up their local season as the defending champion Wicked Pissahs take on the Cosmonaughties for the Season Two title on June 14. This rematch of Season One’s championship is sure to be a screamer, with the Cosmos gunning for a different outcome this time around.

Both leagues will be attending the East Coast Derby Extravaganza on June 21 and 22 in Philly. Cincinnati will be taking on Grand Raggidy (23) and Texas (4). The Boston Massacre will be playing Houston (24) and Rocky Mountain (14), who just handily defeated Boston’s closely matched sister league, the 15th-ranked Providence Roller Girls, in a 137-9 blowout in Denver.

Additional reporting: Harley Quinn

331 Betty Spite // 1984 Claire D. Way // 617 Cookie Push // 9669 Harley Quinn // 99 Harlot Fevah // 843 Krush Puppy // 011 Lois Carmen Denominator // 34B Maura Buse // 28 Pussy Venom // 24 Quick Sandy // 4.0 Sarah Doom // -0 Shelby Shattered // 1001 Sugar Hits // 3D Triple Deck-Her

76 Sadistic Sadie // 85 Hannah Barbaric // 18 Roseanne Scarr // 75 MPH Blu Bayou // 45 caliber Arche Enemy // 60 Shirley Temptya // 66.50 Sister Saralicious // 21 June w/ a Cleaver // 74.00 Juwanna Hurt // 4 Killian Destroy // 41 Panterrorize // 29 Ruff’n the Passer // 11 Sk8er Kinney // Mae C. Stars

Lizzy the Axe, Frau Scientits, Mary Tyler Roar, and referee Seamonster star in a genius little series of PSAs produced by the Minnesota RollerGirls. Required watching.

(edit: score corrected from NYSE 127 to NYSE 125)

KENDALL PARK, NJ — In a meeting of The Original vs. The Best on Sunday night, the undefeated kings of East Coast men’s derby continued their dominance over their regional rivals, as the New York Shock Exchange ground out a relentless 125-44 win over a valiant but outnumbered and overmatched Pioneer Valley Dirty Dozen from Northampton, Massachusetts.

This was New York’s first defense of the “Athletic Cup” trophy they claimed after their April 2007 debut against Pioneer Valley — an unofficial yet highly coveted representation of excellence in the field of male derby. New York came into the bout fielding a full roster of 14, while the Dirty Dozen had to do nearly double duty, with only 8 skaters suiting up for the matchup.

Pioneer Valley took the first jam of the 40-minute bout as recent PVRD acquisition Jurasskick Park managed to sneak between NYSE blocker Darth Invader and Angelo Death to claim lead and get a 3-1 win over NYSE superstar Jonathan R, but that was the only time they’d enjoy the advantage. On the next jam, Mothra got the NYSE in front to stay with a 4-0 over Dr. Spankenstein, as the Dr. got bottled up by T-Stop Tornado and Jonathan R. taking solid control of the front of the pack.

Read the rest of this entry »

BALTIMORE, MD — In the second of back-to-back narrow upsets in Charm City’s third season opener, last year’s third-place Junkyard Dolls surprised the two-time CCRG champion Night Terrors by a final of 74 to 63.

Both teams relied heavily on new blood in this contest. The Night Terrors, adjusting their gameplan after losing most of their jamming core during the 2007-2008 offseason, got a solid debut from rookie Minnie Piledriver — who led the Terrors with 18 points — and also key performances from Speed Regime transfer Psycho78 (17 points) and third-year veteran Rosie the Rioter (15 points.) The Dolls also had a significant Speed Regime transfer in Flo Shizzle, who led the scoring with 32 points and sealed the win with some late-game heroics.

As the bout kicked off, the Terrors immediately fell into a hole when leadoff jammer Marzipain went to the penalty box in the very first jam on a cutting-track major — opponent Flo Shizzle would score 7 points in that full-length jam, and followup Doll jammer would get a 9-3 win over Marzipain in the following frame. This left the Terrors looking at a disheartening 16-3 start after just two jams, but they’d regroup quickly.

Pulling lead jammer on 5 out of the next 6 jams, the Terrors went on a dominating 31-7 run — keyed by an 8-0 for Psycho78 over Ella Fitz-Peril in both jammers’ team debuts — that lifted the defending champs to a 34-23 lead.

But with things starting to look a little grim for the Dolls, team captain Dolly Rocket chose that moment to give her team a major boost by taking the jammer star on consecutive jams — first, she got lead and a 4-2 win over Psycho78, and then went right back to the jammer line for an explosive 10-0 win over Minnie Piledriver that put the Dolls back in front, 37-36.

Read the rest of this entry »

DENVER, CO — May 3rd brought Providence Roller Derby’s 15th-ranked Rhode Island Riveters to Denver to bout the Rocky Mountain Rollergirls’ 5280 Fight Club, ranked 14th in the nation. Both teams recently walked away from close defeats – Fight Club lost to 13th-ranked Charm City in March while the Riveters suffered a narrow upset to the unranked Maine Roller Derby less than a month ago. Regardless of past bouts, it was generally assumed that this would be an extremely close match due to these two teams’ spots next to one another within the rankings.

Things started off with RMRG’s She Who Cannot Be Named up against PRD’s Hysterica! on the jammer line. She Who grabbed lead as well as four points, calling it off before Hysterica! could make it to the pack. Next up, RMRG’s Frida Beater faced off against PRD’s Cleo Patronize, adding nine points for a total of 13 while PRD was still stuck at zero. RMRG continued to rack up the points and keep PRD at zero until the tenth jam of the game, when Hysterica! managed to score four points as well as gain lead jammer, though by this point RMRG was already at 39 points. Hysterica!’s points were the only ones to be put up on the scoreboard throughout the first period for PRD, with halftime putting RMRG at 67, PRD 4.

While the Riveters had no shortage of hard hitters such as Bunnicula and Burnin’ Helen, they seemed to be suffering in the jammer department – Hysterica! would be the only point scorer of the game as well as the only jammer to successfully gain lead with the exception of one jam by Cleo Patronize. Fight Club’s defense was outstanding, however, with pivot Winona Fighter controlling the front throughout the majority of the game while blockers Madam Maimya, Ida Hustler, Pinky 500 and Assaultin’ Pepa built unbreakable walls and consistently kept the PRD jammers from ever leaving the pack. The final score found RMRG at 137, PRD 9.

The top scorers for RMRG were Frida Beater with 60 points and She Who with 58. Frida grabbed lead jammer 70% of the time while She Who earned it 69%. Luscious Smacksome and Smashbox earned nine points each, while Ida Hustler scored one.

PRD’s only point scorer for the night was Hysterica! who earned 9 points and gained lead jammer 33% of her time on the track.

Rocky Mountain doesn’t waste much time before their next challenge, heading down to Phoenix to take on Arizona Roller Derby this Saturday, May 10th. Providence’s next action will be their local season opener, as the Old Money Honeys take on the Mob Squad on May 30 — but they’re next in all-star action at Philly’s East Coast Extravaganza on June 21 and 22, taking on 22nd-ranked Atlanta on Saturday and 13th-ranked Charm City on Sunday.

BALTIMORE, MD — A resurgent Mobtown Mods team went from worst to first in Charm City’s local season opener, thrilling their fans with a back-and-forth 74-58 win over last year’s second-place Speed Regime that came down to the very last jam.

While the off-season addition of two-time league MVP Joy Collision was a major factor in their victory — she scored 44 of the team’s 74 points — a strong second-half showing from Lady Quebeaum, along with some effective pack play from Judy Boom, Penaltyna and Angthrax, were crucial elements of the win. On the Speed Regime’s side, rookie jammer Bambi’s Revenge made an impressive debut with 17 points on 4 jams, while Stormin’ Mormon led the Regime point totals with 19, and transfer Holly Go Hardly (playing against the team she played for last year) was a monster in the pack.

For the first few jams of the bout, it looked like the Mods were going to go down to another of the lopsided defeats that characterized their winless 2007 season. After an opening 1-1 between Stormin’ Mormon and Joy Collision, the Speed Regime took lead jammer on the first five jams of the bout and constructed a 15-1 lead. However, after a Mod timeout, the red-and-black came storming back, opening with a massively crowd-pleasing 14-0 jam for Joy Collision over Deathany (who’d spend a minute of the jam watching from the penalty box) and following up with a 4-0 victory for Duchess of Torque over Stormin’ Mormon.

Read the rest of this entry »

By the final whistle on Saturday night, the Philly Roller Girls 2008 intraleague seeding will have been determined. Although any skater on either the Philthy Britches or the Heavy Metal Hookers would tell that her team should be first-ranked, we’ll find out for sure when the two teams meet head-to-head in the second of the evening’s two bouts. First up, however, the Broad Street Butchers face off against the Carolina Rollergirls’ Trauma Queens, who hope to fare better at the hands of a Philly home team than their sisters the Debutante Brawlers did in their 65-77 loss to the Hookers in March.

The Trauma Queens have only one bout to their name this year - a win vs. the Tai Chi-tas - while the Butchers are winless against the other Philly teams this year and have yet to play visitors from another league. The Butchers will be hoping to sharpen their skills in preparation for the East Coast Derby Extravaganza in June, at which they will challenge the Dutchland Rollers of Lancaster, PA; however, they will surely miss the services of all-star jammer Persephone (broken hand in her team’s 46-92 loss to the Hookers in April) as well as blockers Skirt McGirt and Jane Fondle.

The second bout of the evening will see the new and improved Heavy Metal Hookers taking on the 2006 and 2007 league champs, the Philthy Britches. The Hookers are claiming that 2008 is the “Year of the Hooker,” but the Philthy Britches have never lost a bout in three years of intraleague action and are coming in hot with big wins recently versus Harrisburg (142-92) and the Connecticut Rollergirls (123-36). This also happens to be a preview of this year’s Warrior Cup championship bout, as both teams have secured a spot in the finals. Even though the outcome of this meeting will not affect who plays in the June championship, the teams will surely be using this occasion to prepare their game plans for that meeting - and bragging rights are on the line.

The Hookers may be playing with out 2007 league MVP Teflon Donna, as her spot on the roster will be a game-time decision; the Britches will skate without two of their powerhouse blockers, Rosie Bloodbath and Dara Licks.

Read the rest of this entry »

On Saturday night, Charm City start their third season with a double header in downtown Baltimore, as the defending champion Night Terrors go up against the Junkyard Dolls and the Speed Regime takes on the Mobtown Mods. After two all-star bouts in the Baltimore Armory, Charm City moves to DuBurns Arena (home of major league indoor soccer’s champion Baltimore Blast) for their local season.

This five-bout season will be a bit shorter than the first two Charm City local seasons — with each team only facing each other once before a playoff doubleheader, every bout will be crucial to determining the #1 seed for the playoffs.

While the Night Terrors and Speed Regime dominated the first two seasons, a number of trades, retirements and transfers has scrambled the landscape and given the Junkyard Dolls and Mobtown Mods a serious shot at this year’s Donaghy Cup.

Night Terrors

The Night Terrors find themselves in something of a unfamiliar position as the 2008 season starts. Every longtime Charm City fan knows their storybook tale of their thrilling two-point last-jam comeback win in the 2006 CCRG championship over the previously undefeated Speed Regime and their season-long struggle for supremacy with the Regime in 2007, but with two convincing wins over Speed Regime to finish that season, they find themselves no longer scrappy underdogs but established front-runners, with every team in the league gunning for them.

However, the Terrors still have very much have something to prove this year — that they can take a championship without the help of the phenomenal two-time MVP Joy Collision, who has moved to the Mobtown Mods after two seasons with the Terrors. They’ve also lost all-star Dr. Skabs and veterans Mexican Fury and Nasty Trick since last year (all to CCRG retirement.)

Read the rest of this entry »

On Sunday night, May 4th, the New Jersey Dirty Dames share the spotlight with the New York Shock Exchange in the first of a series of 2008 co-ed doubleheaders hosted by the NJDD at their Kendall Park home rink.

The Dirty Dames’ All-Stars (the “Hub City Hellrazors”) and the NYSE host a replay of last April’s historic co-ed tilt against the female and male Pioneer Valley skaters from Northampton, MA. A year ago, the Hellrazors fell to PVRD’s women (”Western Mass Destruction”) 86 to 58, and the New York Shock Exchange made its bouting debut in a defeat of the PVRD’s men (”The Dirty Dozen”), 109 to 51. With a year’s added experience across the board for all four squads, this year’s results will be anyone’s guess.

The co-ed event will be formatted with four 20-minute periods, alternating as womens / mens / womens / mens, followed by a four-squad after-party.

The most recent public exhibition by the undefeated New York Shock Exchange was a 10-minute quickie on March 29 against Midwest Men’s Roller Derby, a halftime exhibition hosted by the Windy City Rollers.

The NYSE prevailed, 8-3, but lost one of their steadiest jammers, Teen Wolf, due to a bad injury in which his leg was broken in three places. For information about Teen Wolf’s injury and how you can help, click here.

Pioneer Valley’s squads both arrive fresh off April victories, and this will mark the third consecutive weekend of combat for the Western Mass Destruction. On April 26, the PVRD women traveled to New Jersey to handle Morristown, 123 to 44. On April 19, the PVRD women defeated the Diamond City Scream Queens of Wilkes-Barre, PA, 61-53, while their male counterparts cut down the Diamond City Death Kings, 87-50.

Read the rest of this entry »